Anyone wanna give me advice on how not to explode in the next 12 days?

Alex and I decided on a personal treat (in our case, it was going to a movie that was released a couple of days before the wedding) and agreed that we could go see it AFTER the ceremony, as long as we didn't kill anyone at it.

So, um, an incentive of some kind, maybe?

And valium?

Daydream about your fiction works-in-progress. That's how I got through the days leading up to my wedding. Also, once or twice when it's really dire, announce, "I'm going to do something completely unrelated." And then go off (by yourself, preferably, or take Jeff along if he's able to shift focus along with you) and disappear for a couple of hours.

We're very excited for you.

Perspective, perspective, perspective. I don't know what details you're wrangling, but if the flowers are all wrong and the cake doesn't show up and your great-uncle falls and puts a sharp little old man elbow through the drywall at the reception site, you and your sweetie will still be married when it's all over.

Your families will want to be cordial with each other, and your families do not have to become instant best friends. They just have to smile and show up when they're told, and if they forget this crucial point, remind them. Do not hesitate to remind them in very quiet, very calm voices: "All I ask if that you're polite to each other for my wedding. And that if you feel someone has been impolite to you, you take the moral high ground until after my wedding."

I spent the day of gaaldine's wedding in the dress shown above, crawling around under her skirt pinning and sewing. There is nowhere I'd rather have been at that moment because that is where my best girl friend needed me to make her day marrying one of my best guy friends a smooth and happy one. There will be people who feel that way about you.

Um...place bets on who's family is going to behave the worst? Alright, maybe that doesn't work for everyone but it's what kept me and Brian sane when thinking about our two very dysfunctional families being in the same room for a day :)

Just keep breathing.

My biggest help during this period in my own life was actually sleeping enough. If you have time to grab naps, do. If you can go to bed a half hour early, snuggle, then do it. You're heading into a whirlwind, and you need as much energy as possible to get through.

I also liked to repeat that "At the end of the day, victory is mine, I married you" to David from time to time. So much of wedding stuff is about other people (and that's how rituals often are). But keep in mind at the end of the day, you get the prize--you take him home with you.

It comforted me when the babies started screaming during the vows, or when my mom got up and left for the parents dance (she was a little mad at me). I have you in my thoughts, dear, for a sweet, delicious, fast and wonderful wedding. But even if everything isn't perfect, you have each other.

I'm am so happy for you!

I almost forgot: Fight Naked.

David and I won't be able to write in your guest book, so I thought I'd give you the piece of advice that has caused us to nearly die laughing on many occasions, and which has had a good impact on our marriage, as well.

Obviously, you only want to do this with your husband. Fighting naked with others might disturb him a little.

Take deep breaths. Seriously.
Ask for help if you need it, whether it's running errands or making phone calls or you just need someone to tell you a dirty joke so you can take a giggle break.
Don't forget to eat.
Take frequent kitty cuddle breaks.

It sounds obvious, but I got through it by reminding myself that it was all good stress. That all the events were happy ones, and all the people were there because they meant something to me or my boy. I allowed myself to acknowledge that even good stress is still stress, but it's all about maximizing happiness. Sure, I worried about putting my Fundie Christian relatives too close to the table of gamers who might talk out of context about casting spells and killing people-- but the day of, the goodwill and love from everyone was just overwhelming. Know that you have joy ahead of you.

Make a role playing game in your head? Be a charactor that you have always wanted to play?

You have always pulled through when there has been high stress in your life. That is why you are Apocalypse Girl of Doom!

OH! There you go, plan for the apending Apocalypse!

Just breathe...

Party Sunday.

Miriam and i are devising a plan