October 13th, 2004



I have this urge to gather all my friends around me. To banish fears, to sooth hurts, to make things better. I want to take care of them and have them take care of me. I feel within myself the need to babble and to express things that I know need expressing but I do not know what these things are. Every nerve is swollen and sensitive but I still have the need to touch and be touched.

I am scared.

I know it. But, I know it in an abstract way. In a way, I am to the point of simply accepting that the fear is there, it will remain and there is little I can do about it. So, I ignore it the best I can.

I am trying to look at this next immediate step in my life as a vacation with an "ouch" at the beginning. To welcome it as something relaxing and a respite. I will finish my Dragonlance writing for Holy Order of Stars as well as work on the 7th Sea LARP for DDC that Bill and I will be running. I even have two coffee dates set up. Nothing serious. Just meeting people I have wanted to meet for a long time.

I plan to sleep and to dream. I feel starved of my dreams lately. I feel the need to visit those other realities. I suppose, it is escapism for stressful times. What if it is? I am the woman with her head in the clouds and her feet on the ground.

To top it all off: Freewill Astrology for Sagittarius:
Events in the coming week will bring the beginning of the end of an influence you love to hate. They will also usher in a turning point for your relationship with a person you should treat better than you do. And that's just a fraction of the many adventures headed your way, Sagittarius. Finales and climaxes will be in the works everywhere you turn, and you will get one last chance to fix a long-standing mess before it explodes. Is that dramatic enough for you? No? You want even more? OK, then, how's this: You may finally realize what you want to be when you grow up.